Without wings

Please...

My weakness has causes me pain

It hurts

I need to know the truth

But sometimes knowing something will be a wiser option

Knowing it might not even help likewise

Because I'm afraid to know the answer

I need somebody to lend on

Your enter into my life

When the dawn falls

You exit from my life

Without a word

Leaving me speechless

Its funny how you shine my life

Making me a greater person

It's also funny how you shine others' life

A part from me is smiling

Happiness is mend to share around

A part from me is tearing

Knowing the fact you may flame off from my life

Everytime you walk into the room

I'm afraid to move

I'm afraid to walk

I'm afraid to talk

I'm afraid to breathe

If only you ever notice

You might think I might not care

You might think I might not bother

But deep inside from the corner of mind

I'm attached to you

You don't know what you do

But I know when you're gone

I'll start to make my own wings

And soar on my own

Soaring and exploring worlds

Partly thanks to you

Roland's Birthday

Everyone will grow old

So will Roland

Now, his older than me

.....by few days

But it's still counted right, TEOCHEW?

Who own a super duper good new Nokia phone

:)

Went to Fork & Knife, but it was under renovantion.

With low seating Camry and long legged Matthew, he drove us around to look for place to eat

By luck, hardly any place was opened

Went around Jalan Song and Jalan Padungan (main food attraction) but there was hardly any decent place open

And no one wants to end up eating at McD and KFC...AGAIN

The whole time was dialect-ism. It's a fight between Roland(Teochew), Matthew(Foochow), Ik Wei(Hakka), and me(Hakka & Foochow). I'm siding neither Mathhew nor Ik Wei but i'm definitely against Roland *muahahaha*

....talk and driving.....

~after 1 hour~

Finally, we found a place to eat and went to LIFE'S restaurant. Eating "malap" mee. My first time.

Matthew dare us to tried the ultimate spicy. But looks who's sweating here and there... XD

....spend another one hour plus talking craps and Harry Potter...

...birthday boy trying to imitate the talking...

...epic fails...

Then Mattthew send us home :) the driver for the day complaining about petrol

A place I called home :)

This is the end of the the first semester of IRS Russian Programme in Intec

But it's never the time to bid farewell yet

Credit to Cynthia

With loves ~

Finally, I'm stepping into the Land of Hornbill.

Stepping into the Cat city.
There's no other thing better than being in Kuching!
Home sweet home :)

Kuching International Airport

Kuching International Airport during the night

Not to say being in Shah Alam is a bad thing. It's my destiny to be there, so it better be a good reason :)

Time flies really fast. Without realising, I've completed one semester and currently waiting for my result to be post here from SA

T_T

Such a short period of 5 months, which had taught me many things that cannot be learnt from the book. I called it, an experience.

Gaining in experience is one of the neccesity in life. Nevertheless, gaining experience makes one a more mature and independent person. It maybe sweet memories you had with you friends, especially those new friends you had met in your life. It maybe also the experience of adventuring something new, such as learning a new foreign language. It can also be those times when people doubted you, leaving you lost in faith.

Being away from home tends to leave you nostalgia. However, this can be overcome when you have good friends there surrounding you and treat like a part of family. Cherish them!

I've also realised that burning the midnight oil doens't always promised you the best result.

Sigh, there are more to say. But this experience...even language fails to express them!

I guess I'll keep them to myself :)

I'm gonna miss my Russian teacher, Mdm. Marina, who had taught us so much. Not just academically, but also giving us endless moral support especially when we got bad marks.

I will always remember what Mr. Evgeny said "It's better to have 100 friends than to have 100 dollars". Mdm. Marina & Mr. Evgeny seemed to treasure friends a lot :)

Waterfront view during the night

Serene Damai Beach Resort

Big Cat statue found in the center of roundabout of Waterfront

One semester has ended.

But don't be sad.

Instead,

Look forward for the starting new semester!

(Mind my english. I have not been learning English for 7 months...so not so geng anymore)

朋友

Ze xian nian, yi ge ren
(All these years alone)

Feng ye guo, yu ye zuo
(The wind has passed, the rain has gone)

You guo lei, you guo cuo
(There were tears, there were wrongs)

Hai ji de jien chi shen me
(Things we hold dear I still recalled)


Zhen ai guo, chai hui tong
(If you had true love, the you would know)

Hui ji muo, hui hui shou
(There are loneliness, there are goodbyes)

Zhong you meng, zhong you ni
(There are dreams, always there are you)

Zai xin zhong
(In my heart)


Peng you yi shen yi chi zou
(Friends walk this life together)

Nai xie ri zhi bu zhai you
(Those days will not return)

Yi ju hua, yi bei zhi
(One word, one life)

Yi shen ching, yi bei jiu
(A lifetime relationship, a cup of wine)

Peng you bu cheng gu tan gou
(With friends you wont be lonely)

Yi shen peng you, ni hui dong
(Lifelong friend, you will understand)

Hai you shang, hai you tong
(There are wounds, there is pain)

Hai you zou
(Must go our separate ways)

Hai you wo
(Always there is me)

My favourite song :)

Thoughts...

Maybe

Just maybe

A part of loving is

Learning to let go.

Friendship

Made a big mistake

Thinking that you ever care

Said things were meant to give and take

Guess there's nothing much left to share

Friendship is an essence in life

Which were meant to colour your day

By giving the feeling of secure and safe

Like the serene feeling by the ocean bay

I ain't gonna cry

For you can't hurt me no longer

My tears are dry

Means I care for you no longer

I can read you like a book

All of what you say is a waste of time

By the way your look

As sour as lime

You can talk all night

Words ain't gonna hurt me

For I hold on to my choice so tight

Not to care as a better choice for me

I don't care if you were there

You're a big loss leathe

Anytime you're not here

The air is cleaner to breathe

Loner.

I've just realised being alone isn't so bad after all.

Able to make time for myself.

Separating myself from the busy hustle life in a hectic city

To reflect on my action. Past, present, future.

Now, the broken and missing pieces have been put together well.

Even it may not look good as it was before, but at least it's fix into one piece.

Even if it's not a perfect as it was before.

We shouldn't take good happening things for granted.

Or we'll whine for the lost of it

We shouldn't whine for bad happening things as well.

Because we always learn good valuable morals from it, even throught the hard way.

Without learning it throught the hard way, we won't remember about it.

We won't appreciate it.

We won't be able to take it as a motivation in life.

Life is like a maze.

One entrance, one exit.

But branched to so many paths.

It's up to us to take which ambiguos path.

Even we might that the route to the dead end, never give up hope...!

It's never to late to turn back and take the correct path

Which lead you through a tunnel of future bright.

I wonder why am I so poetic and deep-thinking these few days.

Makes me wonder =)

Thursday

Just had my physics quiz. Gonna fail it as usual for I am so un-prepared for it. Played badminton. Never knew Cliff played so rough and bully Vivian somemore XD

Now, I'm here all alone for this coming four days. My roomates are rather active in PBSM (Persatuan Balik Setiap Minggu).



What am I gonna do?



Being poetic.



Being pathetic.



Once I knew a good friend

Who I never thought could never refrain

Now we apart

Life is all about the parcel and part

One who had help me so much

Who I thank so much

For moulding such a tender heart more mature

Your kindness is my nuture

For we are distant now

For a reason which I do not know

Just to let you know

The waves of friendship has it's high and low

It time for me to let you go

My feelings can no longer forge

It's up to you to forget me

But I will never forget you

это всё..!

Latest Update in a new place called Intec. New place, new experience.

This is the picture of my IRS 12 Russian Foundation In Medicine Programme 17 A.

Future doctors. Classmates before, colleaques after.

It has been quite a few months i last updated my blog. Had been quite busy these few months.

I was arranged to be put under the IRS 12 Russian Foundation In Medicine for 14 months by my sponsor in INTEC. 6 years in Russia. Yes, that means I've to learn a new foreign language, Russian.

я люблю изучать русский язык (I love to learn Russian language)

I have to say that the subjects here become harder than how it was in Form 5 and no way, you can't used your Form 5 method study here. It won't work. Also, attending Form 6 classes before coming here makes me understand the subject better towards the beginning. And it gets harder as time passes.

Being here doesn't mean being here academically. For me, coming here is not just to gain knowledge of subjects, but also gaining knowledge in life.

Life isn't a bed of rose

Life is like a wheel, there are ups and downs

Who says life gonna be as easy as ABC?

I shall touch on this no longer further but just to tell you, I learnt slowly to be a more mature person in a hard way. It was never easy for me. Especially for someone like me.

My advice is, if you can get at least one good friend who is willing to stand by your side through out the thick and the thin, you're indeed very blessed. Don't lose such friend. Even though the closest one might always be the one bad mouthing you behind. Chose not to care.

Thoughts

I often close my eyes

And I can see you smile

You reach out for my hand

And I'm woken from my dream

Although your heart is mine

It's hollow inside

I never had your love

And I never will

And every night

I lie awake

Thinking maybe you love me

Like I've always loved you

But how can you love me

Like I loved you when

You can't even look me straight in my eyes

I've never felt this way

To be so in love

To have someone there

Yet feel so alone

Aren't you supposed to be

The one to wipe my tears

The on to say that you would never leave

The waters calm and still

My reflection is there

I see you holding me

But then you disappear

All that is left of you

Is a memory

On that only, exists in my dreams

I don't know what hurts you

But I can feel it too

And it just hurts so much

To know that I can't do a thing

And deep down in my heart

Somehow I just know

That no matter what

I'll always love you

So why am I still here in the rain

...thoughts...

miss you even more dear ♥

2 more days in Kuching

Missing Sarawak ♥

I'm having a bipolar feeling - mixture of sad and excited.

...sad...

I'm gonna miss everything here in Sarawak.

Unforgetable RM 1.50 laksa at Green Road.

Family.

Friends - Old and new.

Teachers who had being the light of my life in guiding me in the darkness of my ignorance till I can be this far =)

Bedroom.

Fridge.

TV

...excited...

Gonna meet new friends.

Gonna learn a new language - Russian !

Being more wise

Being more mature

Getting new experience, including washing and ironing you own clothes XD

For now, I'm gonna miss Sarawak.

In 9 more months, I'm gonna miss Malaysia.

Time really passes really fast.

Enjoy the best of everything while you can.

♥

3 more days

Updates 29.06.2010

Today I went to take my passport photo for the documents JPA at the photostudio.

6 pieces - RM 10

12 pieces - RM 14

16 pieces - RM 18

20 pieces - RM 20

How cunning....

I took 20 pieces one and Mum said I look like some China girls.

Is that a compliment or and insult? Haha

There...

Photostudio ppl : Where are you going? What passport?

Mum : Oh going down to Russia.

Passerby : Oh...taking medicine?

Me : Err yeah..

Passerby : How much?

Me : I don't know..haha

Passerby : You're going and you don't even know?

Me : Oh I'm under scholarship =)

Passerby : JPA?

Me : YEAH !

Passerby : You are so lucky ! Very hard Chinese kena government scholarship. You got Russia again! Some even got India...India terrible. No longer recognise worldwide. You are one lucky girl. You're result must be fantastic. What's your result?

Me : Straight A's haha

Passerby : Very good ! Be careful in Russia. The culture very open. They do "thing" everywhere one. So be careful and don't get involve with them. Study hard there and graduate as a good doctor. Russia certificate can work anywhere one. It's recognise everywhere. Moscow is one of the best medical school. You must aim there.

Me : *I'm bonded with the goverment for 10 years* Hahaha okay I will ^^ Thanks for the advice

Sigh...even Cyril told me about the culture there in Russia.

Why is it so hard being a girl?

6 more days in Kuching

Sarawak Youth Lasallian Gathering 2010 - Sorry can't attend =(

Even if I'm feeling much better today, I still couldn't attend the Sarawak Youth Lasallian Gathering 2010 for the potluck at 6.30pm.

...still down with bad cough and flu..

Anyways, guys...HAVE FUN YA ! ^^

Definitely gonna miss the time we had during the 7th Regional Lasallian Convention camp where I had great fun and met many new friends =)

And also the food drive

It was such a memorable and touching trip indeed !

Once a Lasallian, Always a Lasallian !

(more pictures are in my Facebook profile ya..)

8 more days in Kuching

...and still missing you dear...

S.I.C.K and Maybank

When was the last time you felt like the world spins around you?

When was the last time you felt the scorching fire heat licking you body to sweats?

When was the last time you felt overproduction in your mucous nasal secretion?

When was the last time you blow like a trumpet?

When was the last time your chest keeps beating?

When was the last time you felt the emptyness in your mind?

When was the last time you felt sub consiousness?

When was the last time you felt so tied up?

When was the last time you felt being so useless?

The last time was when you are

SICK

P/s : I'm sick of being sick....it's sickening I can say *sniff....achoo !*

Because of being sick, I did many errors.

I went to Maybank on Monday afternoon with my mum to open another bank account and to apply a supplementary credit card for me. A credit card for emergencies and necessities okay, not a piece of plastic for shop-and-swipe usage. (CIMB bank only for JPA...see how special you are JPA?)

I filled in the application forms (and got nagged by my mum about why my "e"s do not look like "e"s) and waited for my turn to be entertained by the bank worker. It was a rather short wait but it felt like ages and I was sleepy.

Finally! My turn! I was eager to get all of these banking things done, go home and relax for the rest of the week.

However...

Filling JPA forms were more hectic

Did so many errors in writing numbers and very uncertain if Russia spelt with single "S" or double "S"

Black ball pen. No liquid. All in capital letters.

Making one error was like experiencing a gun pointing towards your head.

.

.

.

Hence, continous nagging.

Nine more days in Kuching

S.M.I.L.E

A smile costs nothing, but gives much-

It takes but a moment, but the memory of it usually lasts forever.

None are so rich that can get along without it-

And none are so poor but that can be made rich by it.

It enriches those who receive, without making poor those who give-

It creates sunshine in the home,

Fosters good will in business,

And is the best antidote for trouble-

And yet it cannot be begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is of no value

Unless it is given away.

Some people are too busy to give you a smile-

Give them one of yours-

For the good Lord knows that no one needs a smile so badly

As he or she who has no more smiles left to give.

I always believes that just a smile, can brighten up ones day - even if sometimes things doesn't happen the way you want it to be =D

Piano notes : Meadow (twilight soundtrack)

Gonna miss you so much dear ♥

For you ♥

To lay a kiss on your lips,

so gentle and delicate

is like picking the drops of dew

off the petals of a rose.

I hold you close and feel safe,

sheltered in from the rain,

from the storms that grow and surround me.

I take your hand and look into your eyes

and see a heart made of gold and soul so pure.

You see you are an angel, an angel to me.

I could not help but fall madly in love with you,

the one who stole my heart.

♥

JPA result

It's a miracle =)

I got it !!!

Just So You Know

I'm starting a new blog once again. This means I've move on =)

ANEW LIFE